“Saturday Night Live’s” “Weekend Update” tacked the P’Nut the squirrel saga this week– at it brought his “widow” on to discuss the controversy surrounding the euthanizing of the beloved pet and internet sensation.
P’Nut’s bereaved wife, Mrs. Hazel Nut, portrayed by Sarah Sherman, appeared on the newsdesk in widow’s garb to discuss with host Colin Jost the trials and tribulations she and the famous squirrel suffered.
“The cops raided our house, and then P’Nut bit one, like a damn hero,” an outraged Mrs. Nut explained. “Then they abducted P’Nut and chopped his head off in a rabies test.”
NBC / SNL
“Oh, it’s just so hard to be thrust in the media spotlight, Colin,” Hazel revealed. “I’m used to doing regular squirrel stuff, like, you know, chasing my own tail or running into the middle of a street, seeing a car and then [shakes uncontrollably].”
Hazel revealed that P’Nut is merely the squirrel’s “human name” and that his real name is composed of indecipherable squirrel squeakings.
Sherman’s Hazel Nut recounted to Jost how the couple first came together — meeting at a tree — and made heavy use of squirrelly innuendos while flirting with Jost.
P’Nut was first seized by the Department of Environmental Conservation on October 30th — the New York State department citing anonymous complaints that a known rabies vector, in the form of Fred the raccoon, lived at the house.
P’Nut had lived with guardian Mark Longo for seven years prior to his capture and killing. Longo had rescued the pup after witnessing its mother killed by a car.
The squirrel became a social media star until his untimely and unjust demise.
It was revealed earlier this week that the DEC decapitated P’Nut as part of a rabies test.
That test revealed that neither Fred nor P’Nut had rabies.
The pet-cause was also name-checked by UFC fighter Jim Miller — who called for justice for the furry critter at Madison Square Garden crowd following a first round victory at UFC 309.
